I’d first like to start this letter to say how thankful I am to be able to be apart of the Elephants and Tea herd and how thankful I am to have been able to attend CancerCon [courtesy of the SGAYA Foundation] in Denver this year. I was surrounded by a group of bad asses who have been affected by the demon we all know, Cancer. It truly was a pleasure to travel with you all and to experience this amazing convention once again. I will forever be grateful for everything you guys have done not only for me, but also for many other patients/survivors. Keep doing great things!
A little explanation on CancerCon-
Have you ever felt like you were drowning and trying to come up for breaths of air in a panic of what is happening? Imagine that and even be surrounded by people watching you while you are sinking and just yelling out encouraging words in hope to help you stop drowning. They do not understand the struggle and how hard it is to catch your breath when you suffocating under the pressure of the “water”. I feel this way, yet I am not drowning… I am just living the life of a cancer survivor. I am trying to find my place and trying to get a grasp on this whole life after cancer that I thought was going to be such a simple task. I mean I lived a life without cancer before right? So it should be no problem getting back to that life, correct? Wrong… very wrong. “You’re healthy” “you’re alive” “don’t dwell on the past”. It is easy for those around you to express those words if you are struggling, but they truly just do not get it. I am healthy, but I am constantly feeling around my body to find something wrong. I am alive, but I was so close to death. I dwell on the past because it was traumatizing and the future also scares the crap out of me. I am drowning. CancerCon becomes the hand that pulls me up while my lungs are filling up with water and I am fighting to breathe. Before attending CancerCon I have never felt more alive and comfortable in my entire life. Being at CancerCon I am surrounded by badass individuals, like myself, who understand all the emotions that I am feeling. This convention puts into perspective that, if you had/have cancer, you truly are not alone and you have an army of individuals in your corner. CancerCon will forever impact me in the most positive ways and having the opportunity to attend is truly a blessing.
